Studio Notes - Color On My Belt

This week in the studio, my weekly blog post is a day late.

A voice in my head uses a megaphone to shout that my lack of discipline is unacceptable. While another voice of reason whispers “but don’t forget what you did this weekend,”.

I participated in a jiujitsu competition in Dallas, TX. It would be wrong to write about painting as if my grappling doesn’t heavily influence my style. So let’s talk about the martial arts side of my life for a moment.

Jiujitsu uses a belt system to rank students on the mat. I have been a white belt for about a year and a half-combined. My white belt journey has molded me in ways I could have never saw coming. It’s humbled me, broke me wide open, and given me confidence I never knew I had.

I stood on top of the podium this weekend and took home the gold. Before I could step off, I was promoted to blue belt by my coaches and mentors. I was no longer a blank white canvas.

This belt means more to me than techniques or athletic ability. It’s a sign that I took a step in the direction of realized potential. No longer was it “maybe someday…” the someday is now. My work was publicly acknowledged through the gift of visibility. As someone who struggles to receive this level of praise, it’s an exercise in the art of taking up space unapologetically.

To achieve this goal, I fought myself. Silent drives home, my face in my hands, tears streaming. Facing demons and shadows that scared me half senseless. I met my nervous system and reassured her she’s safe even when I throw her into battle.

I did put paint to canvas shortly before going out of town to go compete.

Although I didn’t “produce” a lot in the studio this week, I did something just as valuable. I put myself to the test. I stepped up to the line. I took a chance. And this time, I walked away a winner.

But it isn’t about medals or belts. It’s the people surrounding me when it happened. They beamed smiles back to me just as wide as mine. We all experienced a moment of expansion together.

My heart is full of love. And my intention this time, is to let this victory settle in. Before rushing to the next competition, the next painting, the next color belt… can I have the discipline to stay in this state of bliss a little longer?

Perhaps coupled with the grace and wisdom to know, I’m no longer operating from a place of potential. I’m changing my life piece by piece, one day at a time.

This week in the studio, there’s not much color on my canvases, but there sure as hell is color on my belt.

Existing between canvas and combat,

Sierra Koch

6-22-26